Day 27 (Post 25) - Up All Night

K, first things first: Marc is back! Marc is back! (for those of you who aren't in the know, he's struggling with some depression. No, it's not a long-term issue he's been having but the recession hit hard and, as a man who defines himself largely by what kind of provider he is, his ego, understandably took a pretty big blow when he couldn't find work. I don't really want to get into it because, somewhere along the line, someone with good intentions who doesn't know him very well (or at all) comes up with all sorts of "better break up with him" advice and I end up getting defensive because, really, when someone says that, you only have two responses: "you're wrong" or "you're right." Either way, I lose that conversation. So I just refuse to have it. Fair enough? Good.

So back to what I was saying: Marc is back! Marc is back! And I am GLAD. More good news: he's coming here to visit FINALLY. Very brief background: Marc and I have known each other nearly three years. We've been an online, long-distance couple for just over a year (it was a year on 21 February 2010) but we have yet to meet in person. Something else many people don't knnow: I haven't seen Marc on a webcam since March 2009. That's right; I haven't even seen him for more than a year. We do talk on Skype daily though and, frankly, although it's been a year, I do remember what he looked like then and I liked what I saw. I don't imagine he's changed a whole lot *smile* He'll be here on 13 May so I'll let you know if I'm wrong, not that it matters.... Love the guy and I'm so excited he's coming!

Other news: to celebrate his return, we stayed up all night, had a very long talk about how his "caving" impacts me. It was a difficult conversation. I said some things that were very painful for him to hear but he clearly understood my pain and how his choices impact us. I'm not a fool - I won't say he'll never cave again but at least this time, he finally knows just how badly it hurts me. After we had some time to talk through our stuff, we did a few activities in Second Life that we both absolutely intend to do when we are together in real life. If you've never heard of it, Second Life is this cool little pixelated world in which you create a highly detailed avatar to represent you. And then your avatar lives in this little world online along with about 10,000,000 other avatars from all over the globe. Some of my closest friends in Second Life are from Brazil, India, Canada, France, the Netherlands and Ireland, to name just a few countries. But I digress. Marc and I spend time in Second Life doing things together that are physically impossible for us to do in real life when we're 4,500 miles apart. Sometimes we fish, sometimes we go exploring... we've gone bowlling, even! But tonight was all about doing something we truly dream of doing together in real life:


We own a house in Second Life together - a lovely Spanish Villa with a roof-top deck. Tonight we played gorgeous Cuban music and did the Argentinian Tango as we just enjoyed the music, each other, and dreaming about our future. We don't just *want* this for ourselves one day. We intend for it to happen.

May 13. He'll be here on MAY 13. I can hardly believe it. After all this time, after doing so many things with our little cartoony selves, we are finally going to meet each other in person. Hooray!

I have a really big thing I want to talk about in my next blog entry. It's about 'feminine health' issues. Have you ever noticed that everyone's a little "hush-hush" about what goes on when you hit perimenopause? I have absolutely no idea what to expect - and it doesn't feel all that different from when I was a little kid and trying desperately to find out how babies are made! Ah well, enough for now - but know that it's coming. I really want to talk about this and I hope you'll either give me some answers or join me in the quest for knowledge! For now, though? Sleep.... I need sleep!

Good night, whoever you are - we'll chat soon!