Right. So, first things first: obviously, I've been gone a while. Ugh, yes it was end-of-engagement related. Oh. Also, I locked myself out of my own blog. I didn't even know that was possible! Well, now I know. Yes, it's possible to set your privacy settings so that you can't read your own blog. Whoops. But I digress. Mostly I've been gone due to the demise of my relationship. If you've been reading this blog/been a facebook friend/known me at all, then you know I needed to just curl up and die for a few months when my (now ex) fiance dumped me just weeks before we were to be married. The breakup itself was bad. But, for reasons I cannot fathom, my ex thought we could continue being best friends after he (as he often called it) "dropped an anvil" on my head. Let me be clear about something: dropping an anvil on my head would have been more humane. Instead, he would do this "but we're best friends!" thing... and then get mad at me for something, call me names, and delete me from his contact lists. Then a month later, "I miss my best friend!" and I'd be re-added to everything, blah blah blah. WHY I let him do this I will never fully understand - I swear I'm not a masochist! Anyway, whenever it happened, an old saying my dad often said would ring in my head, "with friends like you, who needs enemies?"
Finally, two months ago, after another one of his silly hissy fits (I'd had the audacity to say, "I see," instead of "Congratulations!" when he told me about his new girlfriend), I reached my limit and struck back. Suffice it to say that the pen IS mightier than the sword and it's really not a good idea to piss off your extremely tolerant ex-fiance who happens to be a writer too many times because, if you verbally hit her below the belt enough times, eventually, she's gonna slap you back. Which I did. And now he thinks I'm evil incarnate. With a fat ass. (Really? "Fat Ass" is the best he could come up with? Pfff!)
Good. Finally, I've been able to move on! And no, mother fucker, I do NOT want to be friends.
Finally, two months ago, after another one of his silly hissy fits (I'd had the audacity to say, "I see," instead of "Congratulations!" when he told me about his new girlfriend), I reached my limit and struck back. Suffice it to say that the pen IS mightier than the sword and it's really not a good idea to piss off your extremely tolerant ex-fiance who happens to be a writer too many times because, if you verbally hit her below the belt enough times, eventually, she's gonna slap you back. Which I did. And now he thinks I'm evil incarnate. With a fat ass. (Really? "Fat Ass" is the best he could come up with? Pfff!)
Good. Finally, I've been able to move on! And no, mother fucker, I do NOT want to be friends.
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